Saving Money Issues In Relationships
We’ve all had arguments at one time or another with our significant other pertaining to money. Let’s face it, it really doesn’t matter how much of it you have either. If you are in the upper echelon of earners, you simply argue over more zeros. If you happen to live in a place where you lack abundance and financially feel stressed each month, conversations about saving money probably come up more often. The key to understand is that money is not your real problem. It is easy to say, quite another to put into practice.
Let’s take an example. Just for the sake of argument, let’s say that Steve really likes to get together with his buddies on the weekend and it is really the only thing he thinks he does to ‘get away’ from the workweek stresses. Now, his wife, Emily, feels that all the money he spends on drinks, trips to Vegas and all the rest is more than they can comfortably afford at this point. She feels like he is spending their future college savings and retirement when they really only make a little more than enough to get by.
On the outside, this seems like a conversation or conflict over money. But, in reality, it is a conflict over specific needs not getting met. Emily has a problem with Steve being gone, when she feels like he could be home more, especially in their first year together as husband and wife. Steve feels like he needs to get some ‘pressure relief’ with the guys. These are really signs of marriage problems, not money problems. Would having more money help ease their situation? Temporarily, they may not argue over it, but these deeper issues would come back into their relationship.
How Do You Solve Relationship Issues With Money?
Answer: You Can’t! It really is that simple. If you are having relationship issues, then you need to deal with those. Throwing money at these types of problems will never get you what you want. True happiness can never be paid for. Temporary fun and momentary happy distractions can be great, but they will not give you deeper joy. Don’t get me wrong, boats are a lot of fun, Alaskan fishing trips for a week with the guys is a great place to go and diamond jewelry looks gorgeous draped on a beautiful woman. Just recognize it for what it is. These things will never make you have a more enjoyable life with someone that you love and care about. It is the same with arguments about money. Yes, you can have problems revolving money from time to time that are actually just because you lost a job and then have some financial emergency in your life. Imagine that kind of stress. While you can’t completely eliminate risk from life, you can help mitigate the pain of having no money through proper budgeting. A budget will help you and your significant other be on the same page when it comes to spending and saving money in your home.
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